Okay, seriously – why did no one tell me that training in Virginia’s heat and humidity is like running through soup?! And not the good kind, like grandma’s homemade chicken noodle. No, this is the kind where you’re trapped in a sauna, wearing sneakers, and your body is plotting revenge against you.

I signed up for this half marathon thinking, “Oh, it’ll be great! I’ll get fit, enjoy the fresh air, maybe have a few of those ‘runner’s high’ moments.” What they don’t mention in the fine print is that, come summer, you’ll be sweating enough to fill a kiddie pool and wondering if oxygen is even a real thing anymore.

The first mile? Fine. I’ve got this. By mile two in Virginia’s sweltering 1000% humidity, it’s like my body’s been drenched in a layer of glue. My clothes stick to me, my skin’s a slip-n-slide, and my breathing is more like wheezing in a swamp. I didn’t sign up for this. It feels like the sun itself is standing over me with a giant hairdryer, just cranking up the heat to “melt” while I question all my life choices.

Questioning ALL of my life choices here.

People talk about hill training and speed work, but where are the survival guides for heat training in Virginia? I feel personally betrayed by the entire running community. When I imagined running, I thought of cool breezes – not the fiery wrath of the sun trying to roast me alive as I crawl through the neighborhood like a half-melted popsicle.

Now that the whining part of this post is behind me and in the spirit of survival (and humor), here are some tips and tricks I’ve learned for running in the heat and humidity:

1. Dress for Success (or Failure): Wear as little as decency allows. Moisture-wicking fabric is your friend, and if you can, rock a headband that screams “I’m ready for battle!” – even if that battle is just with your own sweat.
2. Hydration Station: Hydrate like you’re prepping for a marathon – oh wait, you are! Bring water like you’re packing for a desert trek. If it’s heavy, you’re doing it right. Just remember: you’ll regret not sipping if you’re suddenly the human sprinkler halfway through mile three.
3. Pick Your Poison: Find the coolest parts of your route. If you can, run under shady trees or near water. Better yet, run through neighborhood sprinklers! If the weather feels like a sauna, at least give yourself a chance to pretend you’re in a tropical paradise….minus the cocktails.
4. Run in the Morning: I’ve forced myself to become a “morning person.” Not because I enjoy waking up at the ass-crack of dawn, but because running before 7 a.m. keeps me from turning into a puddle of sweat when the temps push 100 degrees later in the day.
5. Celebrate the Little Wins: If you manage to finish your run without needing to collapse or slip in your own perspiration, treat yourself! Go grab a popsicle or an ice-cold drink. You’ve earned it, even if it’s just a reward for not dying in the heat. My favorite thing to do is making popsicles out of electrolytes so I can cool myself down and hydrate at the same time. Win-win!

So with that said, I’m sticking it out. Because if I can survive this Virginia heat, I can survive anything. Plus, I hear November races are cool and breezy, and that’s the only thing keeping me going through this summer heatwave. Until then, I’ll just keep dragging my sweaty, soggy self through these hot runs, hoping that I don’t evaporate completely.

If you need me, I’ll be the puddle formerly known as Ana.

Happy running (or melting)!